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At freaking last ....

on Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:29 pm
BMW is sold !!!!

Summing up my BMW ownership in 1 word ..... disappointing ....

With each of my cars, I can tell you a moment I absolutely fell in love with it ...

Be it driving the Audi TT to Le Touquet
Driving the Lotus down the lanes towards Goodwood
Driving the Audi A3 down to Hastings, 4 up, at speed and comfort.
Even the Zafira’s has its moments - driving in the snow at Eurodisney

But, the BMW was never anything than disappointing.

The blooming drive select either made the car too docile, or in sport, fast but too heavy steering, so again, too dim-witted.

Loads of reviews of the 3 series online too (most about manual gearboxes cars) saying that there is no joy to them these days.

Even the dealership said everyone these days is buying either used Audi’s or Merc’s.

I won’t be going back to BMW anytime soon !!!
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Mon Feb 05, 2018 6:10 pm
Good news, one less headache for you

If you were commuting 30-50 miles a day outside londonshire I think you’d have different feelings about it
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Mon Feb 05, 2018 6:48 pm
I used to think that until I drove it up to my brothers in Lincolnshire a little while back - amazing amazing roads - and I still didn’t enjoy it - that’s when it went up for sale once and for all.

Am currently looking at £10k Boxsters !!!! Lol
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Mon Feb 05, 2018 10:05 pm
Don't you think Boxters are rather "hair dresser"?! Cayman - much more manly; especially for a meat eating Estate Agent.....


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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 9:51 am


I don't believe you will find a better driver's car than the BMW 1 Series. You will be missing it shortly.


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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 11:17 am
Mogs wrote:

I don't believe you will find a better driver's car than the BMW 1 Series. You will be missing it shortly.



Not going to happen mate
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 11:25 am
Pleased that you managed to get it sold. However i remember you many times at the time being quite positive about it!

But yeah. Its disappoining if thats the impression it left. Also, i know you drove the 135 too didn't you? Which should have been excellent...but i remember you didn't seem to love that either.

I'm not loving my car situation at the moment...it's more...'reality appreciation' - the C3 Pic is the RIGHT car for us at the moment...it does most thing well and is the right size for us (Lel wont drive a bigger car than this) but it's understandably not a car i feel i have made a proper bond with.
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 12:48 pm
I think I always tried to convince myself it was a good car .... but it never truly felt that way
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 1:08 pm
Thank you for being Frank, frank.

But you know what i mean dont you!

Like..for example...you clearly like the A3 more...its an older car which shiuld just be inferior in every way...but you've bonded with it!

I get this will old/cheap cars all the time.

Like....best example i can think of at the moment drove the bosses Merc C350e a while back....great car, loads of tech and power and stuff....very quick etc. Left me absolutely cold. Yet i can get into a 15 year old (steady) little japanese (steady) car (phew) and totally love it!
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 2:35 pm
Would it be fair to say that BMWs aren't, or at least don't feel, as special as they used to? Likely still brilliant from a technical perspective, but these days Audis/BMWs/Mercs all look a bit samey to me, albeit very flashy and impressive with their ultra-HID lights and multimedia screens...

I was looking at an E39 5-Series for sale earlier - you can look at it and really appreciate the thought that's gone into the design; it looked special. These days they just seem a bit... mass-produced? Probably because there seems to be a heck of a lot more on the roads now than ever before.
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 2:57 pm
I think FF has summed that up pretty well, would you say LK?
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:59 pm
I've bonded with my car in an old man kind of way. OK this road is flat and we can go fast. Oh this road as all kinds of twisty bits, we had better slow down... Oh my god bumps.. slow down..


Loss of testosterone maybe.



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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 8:23 pm
I think it’s a combination of things .... and I prefer my £3k Audi to my mums £26k Audi in terms of fun ...  and here are the potential reasons why ...

1. The very latest cars have zero character - i’m not sure if that’s the engineers striving for quietness all the time, or whether with the latest environmental issues, etc, that they are just turning that way .... but my Audi has a proper exhaust note, and (it’s probably not meant to) but the suspension makes some noises, and the gearbox has a notchy clunk to it .... the very latest cars are way too refined.

2. This is the big one for me .... too many electronic options, which make it feel like you are driving a computer ..... suspension settings, throttle mapping, steering weights ... my Audi has none of that, and feels perfectly set up .... the BMW never felt like that, where as the Audi is instant with every input, the BMW always felt like each input had to go to the computer, the computer had to check what mode you were in, and then decided what it would give you, and it rarely felt that consistent.... settings for settings sake, and each one compromised ... nonsense.

I’m not anti new cars, but I fear genuine fun is a lot harder to find these days as cars have become sanitised for the masses.

Still one of the best cars to drive ever (other than the Lotus and a Caterham) Ford Ka !!!! None of the above ... and you only have to step back 10 years, and these days were the best compromise of enough power, refinement, safety and lack of gadgetry .....

Speed is not what we want in a car, it’s the sensation of speed, and that we are controlling that speed ... every little bit of refinement and electronic intervention is a thin separation from us and that fun ....

LK
BOOK 22 - Chapter 4 - Paragraph 6.

Peace be with you
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 9:04 pm


Say it again LK.

My cock is big and I cannot stand this new stuff.

Very Happy










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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 06, 2018 9:21 pm
LK, that last paragraph is genius!
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Wed Feb 07, 2018 1:37 am
I get the sensation of speed with George. Big ol' boat with a big ol' V8 that sings when at 5000rpm, but actually sounds better when just on throttle (1200rpm - ish) and you can hear the bubb bubb bubb bubb bubb as you plod along.

I fall in love with George every time I drive her.

For instance, the last few weeks the lower tailgate was playing up so I assumed something had worn and while I wasn't worried about replacing it, finding a replacement part would be fun...

Imagine my surprise when I found it is an easy fix. Imagine the boot release button on a RR is a 2 action affair, action 1 releases the top section and a second press, action 2, releases the lower section. So I stripped it and couldn't find any wear or breakages, yet the lower section failed to open Mad

The problem? Action one released the top gate but the latch wasn't fully retracting. This prevented the cam engaging the action which releases the lower gate upon the 2nd press of the button. The repair? Strip, clean old grease and start using Graphite Powder as it's a "dry" lubricant so doesn't tend to suffer from clogging up.

Anyway, I found that out today and yesterday, I mostly replaced a filter at the bottom of the (outer) windscreen that stops the leaves getting into the cabin air intake. I also added stainless gauze which looks subtle, but sets her apart from the usual suspects.

I love cars, you know I always rave about this one or that one. But George is a league of her own.

I was told today that a mate who is an epic mechanic told another mate that when I bought George, they thought I was mental. But (quote) "Give Candoo his dues, he's done a fuucking brilliant job of turning that car around!" This was the mate who initially helped me with a couple of things. However, once I knew where I stood, I was off & running and the compliment was given when he'd heard I renovated the LPG system and she's running beautifully.

There's no compliment like a compliment from another (better) mechanic who's truly in awe of what you've achieved. How chuffed am I?? Very Happy

Anyway, what was the question again? Laughing
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Wed Feb 07, 2018 10:41 am
Very good Andoo.

I know its not the same but i also appreciate the kinda..warble warble of my 3.0 V6 Jeaaaag.

With some custom pipes or whatever, it would sound amazing. It was quite refined from inside so i used to like putting all of the windows down and zooming it. She went well for a 1700kgish car.

But 17mpg was paintful! And i suppose 17 would be a GOOD return for the RR?

But 17 is not good for a 3.0V6.

I did once get the display to read 41mpg! That was in 50mph roadworks on a flat section of the A1 early one morning. That was quite pleasing as you'd never ever see mpg anywhere near 30 never mind 40.

But that wasn't the point. It was a cheap crooner cruiser and a pleasure to waft about in!

The 'bonding' time for me with that car was - i went to do the Yorkshire 3 peaks back in April last year - set off very early drove the whataver it was to get there 1.5-2 hours or whatever. Anyway it was a crisp, clear morning as there were some great roads (near the Ribblehead Viaduct) so i stretched her legs - she was lovely to drive and totally felt at home on the fast sweeping bends and undulations. She was a car that got better the faster you went. A lovely drive, that was.

Why am i saying she? Anyway yeah.
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Thu Feb 08, 2018 4:40 pm
loved the 335d, brilliant in every way except the suspension was too soft, there isnt a diesel on the market (other than the Porsche Panama) that could touch that engine.

it drove brilliantly, was as dosile as my cock at a gay convention or as brutal as my cock at a lesbian scissor event.

I think the 1 series was boring because it was a 1.6 - an old A3 certainly isnt a better car, it probably only feels better because you paid buttons for it

p,s, the i3 is technically brilliant
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Thu Feb 08, 2018 6:57 pm
I suspect you are right ... engine is everything .....

The 1.6T in the BMW was terrible .....  

The 1.8T in the Audi is amazing ..... 100% it’s been chipped .. so responsive, so fast, so torquey, makes a good noise, power deliver ramps up - chalk and cheese with the BMW unit
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Sat Feb 10, 2018 3:30 am
I remember beasting an A3 1.8 turbo in my Doblo, I pissed all over him and we parked up. He couldn't believe a 1.9jtd could be so bloody quick off the mark!

I have her back and working on trying to find the bloody ECU Mad Anyone know how to find it? It's a 2008 (Jan 09 registered) FIAT Doblo 1.9jtd. I know it has the Bosch ECU as it was mapped to the hilt. But now no pedal response and it's been traced to a connection between Throttle Pedal & ECU.... Driving me nuts Rolling Eyes

Anyway, LK, ask Spot, he was in it once Wink It is incredibly quick for a spacker chariot Laughing
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Sat Feb 10, 2018 11:38 pm
I think you were putting too much expectation on the car and liking it. I'm perfectly happy with mine. Would I like something quicker? Yes, but it's a second car, to ferry me to work and back. It's not too shabby for a 1.6.
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 27, 2018 8:05 am
I agree about the sensation of speed, but I think people who feel like that are a dying breed.

You bought a 4 pot BMW 1 series, it kind of says it all really. M135i aside, I don't think the 1 series is a car that is being pitched at enthusiastic drivers.

I suspect that a Fiesta ST or a Corsa VXR is probably more fun to drive than the Majority of BMW/Audi/Mercs on sale today.

How much did you get for it?
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 27, 2018 3:50 pm
I heard it was two scotch eggs and a mars bar
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Tue Feb 27, 2018 4:48 pm
If scotch eggs were involved...surely Spot is now the new owner?
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Re: At freaking last ....

on Wed Feb 28, 2018 5:50 pm
Paul123 wrote:I heard it was two scotch eggs and a mars bar

The garage got £13,250, but had to add a warranty, and clear some profit.

I cleared £12,750 for it.

Was a bargain for someone, but I don't miss it ... (well, I miss the idea of having a lovely new BMW, with leather, in stunning Estoril Blue, etc, etc ..... but I don't miss the reality, which was a car that was all show, and no go)
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